Tuesday, May 31, 2011

What It Wasn't Was Football. Red Alert!

Even with the addition of computer hacking as a reason to bomb someone off the planet, we don't have enough casi belli to keep our perpetual war machine in top form.

Here are a few more acts the Pentagon might use as reasons to wage war:

Flatulism.  As Vice-Adm. Gaylord Billy Lee Dunkle, who is in charge of training Navy Seals at a secret base, put it  recently:  "You ever smelt a Ayrab fart?  Wouldn't take too many of 'em to wipe out an entire Merkin city."  Far fetched?  Not to the Innuit, in whose mythology Matshiskapeu (Fart Man) is a powerful spirit, a Shaman capable of inflicting great pain on humans.

Granted, flatulism can be harmless: St. Augustine, in City of God, spoke approvingly of performers who had "such command of their bowels that they can break wind continuously and at will, so as to produce the effect of singing."

To assure that only terrorist flatulists, who hate us because we have freedom, become targets of war, the Pentagon could make a distinction between "siffleton et bumbulum" (musical farting) and the really, really stinky kind that can cause human beings to suffocate.

Dirty Fingernails.  As the WikiLeaks documents demonstrated, our intelligence has verified that Muslims, particularly in the Middle East, are prone to maintaining very dirty fingernails.  "Lord knows what kind of killer germs they could have in there," one diplomatic cable said.

Picture hundreds of Muslim terrorists spreading out across the country, dirty fingernails laced with lethal germs, and getting jobs as waiters.  And you thought Swine Flu was scary?

Collecting Pornography.  Osama bin Laden did this.  Enough said.

Francophilia.  War is the next step beyond "Freedom Fries."  In fact wouldn't it be a good idea to kidnap all the really good French chefs, press them into service cooking for Our Troops, and then bomb the rest of the dam' Frogs off the face of the earth?

Nuclear Disaffection.  Germany is going to entirely quit making nuclear energy by 2022.  Didn't the Krauts learn anything from two World Wars?

Calling Soccer "Football."  Since every country in the world except the United States does it, this would give the Pentagon absolute license to make war on any other country in the world without so much as an "if you please."

Who needs War Powers Acts and Constitutional restraints?  Bomb! Kill! Make the world safe for Democracy!

Did Anyone Bother to Save Noah's Blueprints?

Like all mothers confronting errant, defiant children, Earth is punishing us.  And the worst is yet to come.

Here in southern New Mexico, we've gone more than 100 days without rain.  The winds came earlier, blew harder and are hanging around longer than any year in memory of most locals.

"Our respiratory systems weren't made to breathe dirt," a doctor friend said the other day when gusts over 40 mph called off our tennis session. 

"Wait till 'monsoon season,'" I replied.  "We're going to get a 200-year-rain and it'll wash everything, including us, down the arroyo to the Rio Grande."  I was only half-joking.

Five years ago we had a "100-year rain."  Lots of flood damage.  The next year we had another, worse rain.  We spent $20,000 repairing the damage to our own house and grounds.

Yet Nature is treating us kindly in comparison with other parts of the world. An epic wave of deadly tornadoes in the central United States.  Wildfires in New Mexico, Texas, California and Oklahoma.  Massive flooding in the Mississippi River valley, in Australia, in New Zealand, China and Pakistan. 

Extreme weather.  "Freak" weather?  No: it's exactly what all the climate science models predicted: a proliferation of extreme weather events.  Climate chaos.  The third law of thermodynamics -- entropy -- on steroids.

We're killing the food in the oceans.  We're melting the polar ice caps.  Grain harvests have failed in Russia, China, Australia and Texas.  Farmers in the midwest can't plant grain because their flood-ravaged fields are too wet.  This in a world where a fifth of the population already couldn't afford adequate nutrition.

Just a run of bad luck? No, all these bad things are happening because greenhouse gas emissions increased by a record amount last year, to the highest carbon output in history, according to the International Energy Agency.  The planet has already warmed by one degree celsius; if it warms by more than another degree, scientists say it will be difficult to sustain human life on most of the globe. Coastal cities, islands, perhaps even entire small countries will be submerged.  Massive human migrations will take place.  "It is becoming extremely challenging to remain below 2 degrees," Faith Birol, chief economist for the IEA, told the Guardian UK. "The prospect is getting bleaker.  That is what the numbers say."


Bill McKibben, one of the first prophets of climate change, says the killer second degree of warming is "already in the pipeline."  The year of record carbon emissions just ended, heaped on the emissions in the years immediately preceding it, means that warming energy temporarily stored in the oceans soon will escape to warm the entire envelope of life-sustaining atmosphere around the planet.

This is happening much faster than even the most dire climate change scenarios predicted.

Our government, our political leaders, and particularly our most profitable corporations, have sneered at climate change.  In fact, the planet-raping profiteers have financed a massive fog of pseudoscientific nonsense to persuade us that we can adapt to whatever is happening.

Somebody build an Ark. Quickly.

Sunday, May 29, 2011

When It was Roland Garros by a Midwest Riverside

Each time I play tennis lately, as I did this morning and do every day that weather and an aging body permit me, I think of the man who gave me the love of the game.

I never knew his name.  He'd be in his 90s now, if he's still alive.

It was a long, long time ago, on the public courts in a river town in the midwest.  Two kids about 12 -- my best friend and I -- were batting a ball around, trying to do the few basic things they'd been taught about the game.

We hadn't seen him approach, weren't aware he'd been watching, for however long.  Long enough to make some observations.

"You've got to change your grip on the backhand," he said.  "Somebody told us to hold it this way," I replied, showing the shake-hands forehand grip we'd been taught.  "Someone" was a recreation department summer employee, who coached softball and baseball mostly, but occasionally dropped by the tennis courts because his tasks also included organizing the annual city tournament for junior players.

"That's the standard forehand grip," our new acquaintance said.  Then he moved our hands the quarter-turn for a proper backhand stroke.  "With this grip you can hit the ball flat for a backhand drive, brush up for topspin, or open the face for slice.  The way you've been doing it, all you can hit is slice -- floating slice, at that.  Hard to control. Give it a try."

For an hour he tossed balls to us -- forehand, backhand; forehand, backhand.  After the first half hour, we were comfortable with the grip change, using the bevels on the handle as a tactile guide.

"Come here often?" he asked when we broke for water.  "Almost every day in the summer," we said.  "OK, " he said, "tomorrow we'll work on the serve."

That was the day I fell in love with tennis. The sound of the ball coming off the strings when he demonstrated serving technique thrilled me to the bone. The serve came naturally to me, and with the tips he gave me on positioning my feet, "lifting" the toss high to get full extension, and snapping my wrist, it became a weapon. Sometimes, when I really popped one on the sweet spot, I imagined I heard that same awesome "thwack"  I heard when he served.

He was, in the parlance of the day, a "tennis bum."  Kramer, Gonzales, Sedgwick, Vines -- these were the guys who competed for championships.  They were "amateurs," there was no professional tennis, but they took money under the table.  Sometimes, when a player or two were needed to fill out a draw, the tournament officials would tap into the pool of tennis bums who followed the tour, hoping for a chance.  The bums would hustle matches for money with the pretty good local yokels, tanking the first set and then offering to double the bet for a "chance to get even."  Sometimes racquet manufacturers would give them day work teaching at clinics at tournament venues.  It was barely a living -- thumbing was the usual transportation between tournament  sites.  He was good, but not good enough to play the tour regularly, and he knew it.  "Some day," he told us, "I hope to find a rich widow who will support me in the manner to which I want to become accustomed."

For two weeks, he drilled us, taught us, gave us tips for competition.  ("If you play a guy with a big serve you can't return, don't move back, move up inside the baseline.  Way, way up.  You might block back a few lucky ones.  More than likely, the big hitter will get upset by the dare, start over-hitting, and start double faulting.  You'll be inside his head then. He'll be putty in your hands.")

One day he simply didn't turn up at the courts.  He had moved on to the next tournament venue, looking for suckers to hustle.

But he'd given us the game.  By summer's end our play had improved so much that the recreation guy ordered us to "play up" into an older group for the city tournament because we were too good for our peers.  My friend Mel upset the No. 4 seed, 6-4. 6-4.  I drew the No. 1 seed, but I only lost by a single break in each set.  "Toughest serve I've faced in a long time," he told me at the net after the match.  "Where'd you learn it?"

"Oh," I said, as cavalierly as a 12-year-old can be, "a friend who plays the tour taught  me."

I like to think he found that rich widow.  What he gave me was priceless: a lifetime of exercise, friendships and fun.

 

Sunday, May 22, 2011

The Very, Very Inner Workings of the American Left

The revolutionary council met Saturday for only the third time this year.  Hiding in a crowd, we spoke in code.

We'll be meeting again in July, this time under cover of culture.  An opera, perhaps, or concert.

To guard against inadvertently leaking keys to our code, I will simply summarize our most recent meeting:

--The country continues to decline at an accelerating rate.

-- Peaceful solutions seem increasingly unlikely.

-- The next step will be to take to the streets.  Even with MLK, Ghandi-style protests, there will be violence.  We formed a slogan committee.  What's the antidote to "Real Men Love Jesus"?  Perhaps the creators of the Landover Baptist website will come up with something. Some of us will go to jail, like the Black Panthers and the Freedom Riders. 

-- Green tea and boutique beer do not mix well. 

--SKG (not his real initials, of course) wasn't really eager to go to jail.  "I still have songs to write, a mortgage to pay," he said.  CKG (not her real initials) gently chided him: "The drop of rain maketh a hole in the stone, not by violence, but by oft falling." He seemed chagrined, but then musicians always look chagrined.

--Bobby Dee (not his real name) was ready to man the barricades.  "How can we take up arms," he asked, "if the NRA has all the guns?"  We named a procurement committee to find our where terrorists, who don't usually belong to the NRA, get their weapons.  "Now that we've killed bin Laden," Mary Dee wondered aloud, "are there any terrorists left? Armed ones, I mean."  We referred the question to the etymology committee.

--"Massive non-violent protests (which of course will be met with violence by those being protested against) have to be tried before we consider taking up arms," counseled Tinkler Tee (not his real name).  "Besides, it's a lot cheaper."  "Nonsense!" roared Little Lulu (not her real name).  "Read your Che."  Tinkler appeared chagrined; but then, aging revolutionaries always look chagrined.

-- "Can Obama be re-elected?" Bobby asked.  Consensus: Probably.  Unless the Republicans manage somehow to find a candidate who does not immediately self-immolate.  "Well, then," Bobby continued, "is it not possible that Obama will transform himself into the President we thought we elected in 2008?"  We dismantled the procurement committee and formed a committee to investigate Obama's election prospects and the possibility of his transforming himself into the President we thought we had elected in 2008.  (Tinkler Tee thought from the outset that the procurement committee was not aptly named.  "It's suggestive," he complained).

--"Who got my green chile cheeseburger?" Bobby Dee asked.  "SKG has traces of green chile in his mustache," Tinkler Tee observed.  Accusations were hurled. The house had no porter.  The enchiladas were overbaked. The waiter demanded a bigger tip.  Chaos ensued.

--But then Mary Dee spoke up over the cacophony: "The Rive Gauche in July?" Glasses clinked.  "The Rive Gauche!" we cried as one.

Chris Hedges to the contrary notwithstanding, the American Left is alive and well.

Saturday, May 14, 2011

Brave Little Bird in a Big, Unfriendly Desert

Brandy and I have a new feathered friend.  Perhaps "acquaintance" is a better word.

Brandy, our six-month-old boxer-shepherd puppy, is in training to be a responsible canine citizen in natural places (I can't say "the wild" because, thanks to The Worst Congressman in History [see previous post] there is no "wild" in southern New Mexico).

Sometimes, on our way to a favorite piece of desert, we stop at a flat, open space on the desert fringe to play a game of "fetch."

That's where I first spotted our new friend, a desert burrowing owl, standing guard over its nest.  Typical of the species, this one is surprisingly bold and approachable.  Standing stock still, it allowed me to get within four feet without flinching.

I threw the ball farther and farther away from its burrow so that Brandy wouldn't catch sight or scent of it and give chase.  While not listed as threatened or endangered in New Mexico, as it is in several other states, the burrowing owl is considered a "species of concern."  That means  further biological research and field study are needed to resolve their conservation status, or they are considered sensitive, rare, or declining. I watched a pet kill an owl once; I don't want Brandy to be tempted to do the same.

On a recent visit Brandy crossed the invisible line between him and the owl; it took flight, soaring 20 or 30 meters away from the burrow.  Brandy began to give chase, but I called him back. As soon as we backed away the bird returned to the vicinity of its burrow, scolding us with loud "chuck-chick" calls.  It stood as tall as it could on its long legs, making itself look bigger than its actual size (8 or 9 inches tall).

I admire the owl's pluck and courage.  It'll stand up to any predator, warning it away with "chucks" and sometimes screeches, but if the enemy crosses the invisible line it'll take flight and try to lure the predator as far as possible from the nest. 

Even where it's not listed, the burrowing owl population is declining, largely because of people.  We're encroaching on and destroying its habitat.  At first I thought it odd that  our owl had chosen our "fetch field" for its home, opting for a flat, open space rather than the deeper, more heavily vegetated desert.
Moments later I had my answer: a pick-up truck passed by on the nearby road, with two off-road machines in its bed.  The ATV people are all over the deep desert, cutting roads where there weren't any, savaging the habitat of countless desert dwellers including the burrowing owl, its food, and its predators.  Equal-opportunity habitat-destroyers.

Big contributors to the campaign funds of The Worst Congressman in History, whose name is Steve Pearce and who seems to hate every living thing except his fellow Republicans, especially the very, very rich ones in the extraction industries.  Drill, drill, drill.  Destroy, destroy, destroy.

I looked back at the burrowing owl, standing tall again and chucking at Brandy to stay away. Be safe, little bird, I thought.  Be bold and plucky and courageous.  I'm glad you can't understand how heavily the deck is stacked against you.

Sunday, May 8, 2011

When If Ever Will We Say Enough is Enough?

The latest round of Labor Department statistics contains no surprise, although in countries with informed, sane populations they would incite riots and revolution:  worker wages are stagnant, corporate profits have soared and CEO pay is at record levels. 

Ho-hum.  Whazzup with Lindsey, Brad and Jennifer?

You're paying more than $4 a gallon for fuel to drive to work (where your paycheck is the same as last year but buys less) while the company that sells you gas increased its profits 42% or more in the most recent quarter.

You pay 20 per cent or more income tax on your stagnant wages.  Exxon, the most profitable company in the history of money, paid 3.6%.  Chevron, whose profits rose nearly 50% last quarter, paid 5.6% income tax on its obscene profits.

But, hey, if companies make money, that creates jobs, right?

Wrong: energy company profits do not go back to communities to create more jobs, they don't get invested in improved equipment and exploration.  They go into dividends and stock buy-backs; the companies have a cash on hand reserve of nearly $100 million.  Their CEOs average $15 million a year in salary; two companies pay their chief honchos more than $100 million a year.

We subsidize these companies with taxpayer money to the tune of more than $4 billion a year.  Divert these funds into subsidies for renewable green energy and you solve our national energy problems in jig time. 

Our military is the biggest petroleum consumer in the world.  If we waged peace rather than war, we wouldn't need to award no-bid contracts for Air Force fuel to BP, whose massive drilling disaster virtually killed the Gulf of Mexico and drove its hard-working fisherman into bankruptcy.

The Koch brothers alone make $13 million a day in energy profits.  Thirteen million dirty dollars a day!  They buy pols like Scott Walker and Rand Paul out of petty cash.  They drop $30 million alone on anti-environment causes -- support for air pollution, water contamination and public land devastation.  They have funded more than 300 think-tank papers seeking to destroy Social Security.  They invested millions more in the current campaign to destroy workers' unions.  Real philanthropists, Chuck and David. They think unemployment benefits are a sop to the lazy.

Did you ever wonder why the richest nation on earth "can't afford" to make sure that every citizen receives decent basic health care?  Because the five most profitable private health insurers -- United Health Care,. WellPoint, Cigna, Aetna and Humana -- have formed secret committees that meet regularly and spend freely on lobbying, strategies, political blackmail and fake grassroots organizations called "Astroturfs" to repeal even Obama's Milquetoast efforts at health care reform.  While you're sending out resumes in a vain quest for jobs at half the salary of the one USA, Inc. shipped out to Sri Lanka, the insurers are spending millions per day to see to it that Grandma loses her Medicare.

Hey, now, who's gonna be on Dancing With the Stars? The Voice?  Man oh man, Has America Ever Got Talent.

See millions of people shove their heads into the sand.  You know what happens when they're bent over  like that.

Thursday, May 5, 2011

The Scheme Worked; the Reports Failed

The volunteer public relations arm of the military-industrial complex simply cannot control its compulsion to "justify" this country's crimes.

The assassination of Osama bin Laden turned the compulsion into a frenzy.  Once, when real journalists worked in the mainstream media, they guarded rigorously against jumping to conclusions on major stories like this one.

Not so today.  Our use of drones for illegal acts of war in Pakistan has turned countless numbers of Arabs against us and drawn fierce criticism here and abroad. And so, when word first trickled out that Bin Laden was dead, Fox Fiction immediately asserted that he had been killed "a week ago" in a drone attack that killed 28 civilians in Pakistan.  John King of CNN and others rushed to the assumption that a drone attack had killed the al Qaeda leader. "Proof" that drones are good despite the criticism.

Worse still was the media's ex post facto sanctioning of Bush era torture of detainees. The critical piece of information that led to finding bin Laden came out in "harsh interrogation" (the United States media's official euphemism for torture) of detainees in Gitmo and black holes abroad -- or so said Fox's O'Reilly, David Martin of CBS, Jonathen Karl of ABC, the Los Angeles Times, the Washington Post and NBC.

In fact, said the White House counter-terrorism chief John Brennan, bits and pieces of information acquired over nine years was meticulously assembled into a plausible narrative by analysts, and pursued on the ground by CIA agents using traditional gumshoe techniques.  In fact, the two prisoners who underwent the worst and most extensive torture never "broke:" it was their continuing denials about the bin Laden courier that made his captors suspicious that they were lying.

The media rushed to repeat government disclosures about the raid without bothering to inquire about the obvious red flags.  The quick burial at sea was a buried factoid in the early accounts.  Nobody asked why until the following day, when CNN put out a brief based on its query to the Pentagon.  The media reported as cold fact that Osama "resisted" capture.  But in those reports he was also said to be unarmed.  If he was unarmed, how, then, did he "resist?"  Nobody asked.  Brennan at one point amplified on bin Laden's "resistence" by saying he didn't know if the al Qaeda leader "got off any rounds."  The media unquestioningly armed him in their ensuing accounts.  By yesterday, they had disarmed him again.  Did nobody ever hear of follow-up questions?

There's the matter of the helicopters.  Mechanical failure of 'copters doomed Jimmy Carter's ill-fated attempt to rescue hostages in Iran years ago.  Curiously, one of the choppers in this raid also failed.  Fortunately, the helicopter malfunction on the Bin Laden mission cost no U.S. lives and did not sabotage the mission.

But nobody asked what kind of helicopter this was.  There were vague explanations that the machine "wouldn't start" when the commandos prepared to leave.  Who made the machine?  Are failures -- to start, or to function properly in high temperatures, or when widgets shake loose -- endemic to this machine?  If so, why was it trusted on so critical a mission?  Who makes the things?  Is the maker being held to account for whatever might be wrong with the things? 

These and other questions should have been raised instantly by reporters and editors. But the propagandists who are represented by their media employers as "journalists" didn't ask them

The very legality of such an operation under international law is another obvious question.  In the UK, the Guardian bothered to raise it, and investigate it.  The body of evidence suggests that it was not legal.  Having painted ourselves into a policy corner where  we had no allies we could trust in Pakistan,  we had to risk acting illegally to preserve the required secrecy of the mission.

The end justifies the means.  Just one of the many ethical fallacies that make a mockery of our professed dedication to "the rule of law."

Even in success, we are morally bankrupt.  But our sources of "news" will never tell us that.

USA! USA!  (Do I hear an echo?  It sounds something like "Deutschland uber alles.")

Monday, May 2, 2011

After bin Laden, What Will Change? Not Much.

Watching the crowds outside the White House last night an image flashed through my mind of the victorious warlord of eld prancing on horseback around the square with the the severed head of the slain enemy leader impaled on his pike to the huzzahs of his minions.

How desperately we cling to the myth of American exceptionalism!  President Obama fed the frenzy:

    But tonight, we are once again reminded that America can do whatever we 
    set  our mind to. That is the story of our history, whether it’s the pursuit of   
    prosperity for our people, or the struggle for equality for all our citizens; our 
    commitment to stand up for our values broad, and our sacrifices to make the world
    a  safer place. . .

Well . . . the Bin Laden mission may turn out to be as critical to this President's re-election campaign as the original 9/11 attack was to the re-election of George Bush. So perhaps his flag-waving bovine excrement can be shrugged off, if not forgiven.

This is not to make light of the work of those who planned and executed so flawlessly what was essentially an act of police work: the killing of a most-wanted criminal.  In all likelihood, this act of police work could have been accomplished ten years ao, when the sympathies of the entire world (including Muslim leaders) were with us, and the pooling of intelligence and resources through multinational cooperation might even have yielded a living Osama bin Laden to try and presumably convict under cover of law.

But Bush, an instrument of the corporate militarism that runs this country, and not a very intelligent one at that, had to have his war.  Eight years to the day after he put on his sojer suit and paraded across the deck of an aircraft carrier to declare "Mission Accomplished," another American President actually accomplished a mission.  A difficult, complex and terribly important one, to be sure.

But after more than 7,000 American deaths, tens of thousands of American casualties, hundreds of thousands of Iraqi, Afghani and Pakistani civilian deaths; after spending ourselves into an enormous deficit waging unnecessary wars and starting new ones; after squandering the empathy of the world and creating new hostilities, are we really entitled to wave flags and chant "USA! USA!" because we finally brought Osama bin Laden to justice?

Did we put as much planning over the last nine months into what would follow a successful mission to apprehend or kill Bin Laden (at least one news agency says the goal never was apprehension)?  Will we end our present wars quickly and be less hawkish about starting new ones? At home will we repeal the unconscionable so-called Patriot Act, restore civil liberties, stop spying on American citizens and turn full attention to meeting the basic needs of the American people?

The organization for which Bin Laden was but the financier and figurehead still exists.  Its recruiting of terrorists and their dedication and fanaticism have been fueled by the wrongful American foreign policy of the last decade.  Those who have studied al Qaeda most closely are certain that retaliatory terrorist acts are inevitable now that Bin Laden has become a "martyr."

The need for vigilance will give our elected officials and the vast military machine plenty of cover to continue wars, spying, torture and whatever else they need to further the policies that degrade us as a nation.

What will change now that we've offed the bad guy?  Very little, I fear.

But Barrack Obama's political future looks a lot brighter than it did 48 hours ago.

Sunday, May 1, 2011

A Steep Plunge into Stygian Slime

The "slippery slope" is one of our more tired and threadbare metaphors but it remains apt when applied to the Obama-Bush war machinery.

Take our fourth-front, third war in Libya: it was sold to us (all of our wars are cleverly marketed, like Super Bowl commercials) as a safe-distance, no-boots-on-the-ground humanitarian intervention.

But now, oops!, we have killed Col. Gaddaffi's youngest son and three grandchildren, innocent kids no matter their bloodlines, in an attack on one of the dictator's homes.

Despite the clever commercials, our image in the world has plunged down a slippery slope from humanitarians to child-killers.

The most recent victims are simply more prominent than countless others in our wars.  The sad fact is that we can only estimate the number of innocent kids we have slain in Iraq, Afghanistan, Pakistan and, now, Libya.

What kind of people are we to look the other way while trillions of our tax dollars are spent in the willy-nilly slaughter of innocent children?

What kind of hypocrites are we who elect sociopathically dereistic politicians to our legislatures, intent upon paying the costs of these wars by condemning American citizens to suffer without health care, food, jobs or basic necessities of life?

What kind of heritage of barbarism, savagery, ignorance and self-deceit do we fashion for our own children, who will inherit our debt and the hatred and contempt with which we are viewed elsewhere  in the world?

How many wars will they  have to fight because of that hatred and contempt? How many of them will bleed and die for an ignoble cause?

What further debasement will we reap for having sown our seeds of destruction by remote control, death by robot, massacre by drones?

Is there no end to this madness?

Have we plunged so far down that cliche'd slope that not just present, but also future generations of Americans are condemned to wallow forever in the Stygian slime of militarism, war and the stench of the death of innocents?

When, oh when, did we give away the nation forged in revolution and defined by the likes of Madison, Jefferson, Washington and Adams?

Perhaps only another revolution can reclaim it.  Or, worse, perhaps it is lost beyond reclamation.